Covert Preparation.

Two mornings in a row, I've bundled up and literally power walked from the door of my house to my car wondering why in the hell I didn't wear a scarf. 

Yesterday morning, I had to stand out in the cold bitter wind and scrape my windshield. I have much love for Randy Travis, but I do not enjoy having to dig the cover of his Greatest Hits CD out of my glove box in order to create a visual hole so that I can drive my car to work. 

At this very moment, I'm sitting here in a sweater with the heat on, looking around outside, and I don't like this situation one bit.The colors out there may be great and all that, but it's totally a fake out. Dude, this totally isn't fall.  

If it were fall, I'd be enjoying a couple months of perfect weather. If it were fall, I'd be wearing a hoodie and flip flops at the same time. If it were fall, I'd have the windows open and breeze blowing through my house. If it were fall, I wouldn't be freezing my figurative balls off right now.

So, what I wanna know is - where did my summer go? And more importantly - where exactly is my fall? I'm pretty anxious and unsettled here. Old Man Winter totally wore out his welcome and ruined most of my spring, and I'll be damned if his cold ass didn't come back early to ruin my fall. I feel as though I do not like this old man having his cold ornery ass all up in my other seasons. 

Sometimes I joke about having Seasonal Affective Disorder, but I probably shouldn't. Honestly, chances are - I totally have it. But I just can't properly diagnose myself with such disorders with a PhD from Google University. So, no - I've not been properly diagnosed with SAD; None-the-less, weather like this totally makes me...sad. And for a number of reasons. 

Let's just throw them out there in a bundle: I do not like to get out of a warm bed when it's cold. I do not like having to get up early to make sure I have time to thaw my car out. I do not like to shave my legs when I have goosebumps. I do not like having to wear sweaters and jackets because they make me feel restricted. I do not like having to wear thick socks and boots in order to keep my toes warm. I do not like having to do more loads of laundry because of wearing layers. I do not like that I can't wear my capri yoga pants. I do not like that I can't wear my potato shoes or flip flops.I do not like staying inside all the time. I do not like that I can't go swim in the creek whenever I take the notion. I do not like when all the trees die and everything turns gray. I do not like it when the latch on Charlie's driver side door freezes and won't close. I do not like driving to work in the dark, and then driving back home in the dark. I do not like them in a house. I do not like them with a mouse. I do not like them here or there. I do not like them anywhere. <--- minor adolescent moment there...don't judge me over a Dr. Seuss book on a Thursday when it's cold.

"Hibernation is a covert preparation for a more overt action."- Ralph Ellison

...I'm gonna go eat a bunch, and plug up my butthole now. I'll see y'all in the spring. :)