To Have One, Be One.

It's Friday again here at headquarters...I'm beginning to see a pattern here! Except today, I really do have something to say. 

This time last year, I lived by myself and had no responsibilities other than doing my own laundry, feeding my dog and managing to get to work on time 5 days a week. I had a boyfriend that worked 2nd shift, and I had a lot of free time on my hands to do with as I saw fit. Usually, I spent that time visiting and hanging out with friends. 

This year, things are tad bit different. I now live with that boyfriend, his 11 year old son and 3 dogs. My responsibilities are far more than what they had been prior to combining homes. There is far more laundry to keep up with, cleaning to stay on top of, meals to cook, and quality time that needs to be spent. I love the guys at my house and when I get off work I'm in a hurry to get there to see them. I don't even like to take the time after work to go tan, or get my nails done...at 4:00 pm, this girl just wants to go home!

Given the current scenario, you can imagine that I don't have very much time to spare. It seems like there is always something that needs to be done, and if the time comes that there isn't, or if I decide to neglect something...I normally use that opportunity to do absolutely NOTHING. Maybe take a nap. 

I understand that it may not seem this way, because you all forever see shit about me and my soul sister on Facebook. And I understand why people may think that we live the most epic lives in the history of lives...but the reality is, we really don't. All those funny conversations and quotes and such that you read...yeah, 90% of those took place over the phone while I was taking a shit. And here's something else about the "Jessicawhompus" relationship that you probably did not know: it's not always about doing something fun. 

When she calls and I say, "Ugh! My house is upside down and there is something in the sink that stinks and a mountain of laundry to fold." 
She says, "I'll be there around 6:00, we'll knock that shit out. I'll dust the living room."  

Or when I say, "Those damn bitches left a crap load of furniture in my house and it's 125 degrees in there and I have three days to get it out." 
She says, "I get off at 4:00, I'll grab us a coke zero and gas up Whitey Ford." 

And when I say, "My hormones are out of control and I'm cranky and I hate the world!"
She says, "Take a midol and calm down. I'll cook dinner for you guys." 

If we're lucky we get to spend one day a week together doing something that we actually enjoy like going to river and floating around, or going to Scriber's for karaoke and dinner. We don't exclude people from these plans, we normally have at least one of our combined three children with us, we announce what our plans are via Facebook and we don't hide from people. We've never once stated our plans and then included a disclaimer that said no one else was invited, nor have we hoarded a table and refused to let someone sit with us.

And now finally, this is what I have to say today: The people who are in and are actively a part of my life right now are there because they put forth an effort to be there. They are there because they want to be there, even when the times aren't fun. They know my plans because they take the time to call and talk to me. They don't require a signed sealed and delivered handwritten invitation to join me in my endeavors, they know they're automatically invited because that's what what being friends is about. 

So, if it makes me a bad friend because I handle my business and do what I need to do as responsible adult first, and then put my effort out there to have fun with the ones that have put there effort out there for me when times weren't so fun, then fine. But what you people need to realize is exactly this: I don't do anything that you don't do. Friendship isn't one sided, and I'm not going to feel bad about my efforts, especially if they are equal to yours. 

Shit happens. Life Happens. So be it.