In January:
- I learned that "abominable-snowman-bigfeet-hillbilly-beasts" won't chase you through a corn field because the stalks hurt their feet...so in case of an bigfeet emergency, the corn field is the best escape route. Handy little bit of information to have.
- I lost my motivation and was too lazy to offer a reward for it's safe return.
- Received my very first Dear John letter, my favorite bar burned down, I fell off the wagon - all in a week.
- I realized that sometimes, the bad decisions are the ones that are the most fun.
- Favorite Quote: "baby, you look good in those crotch-less overalls...scrumptious like a sausage biscuit..." - B Shrader & RFR
- I turned 28 and it was great - realized that I share a birthday with Johnny Cash!
- I carried right on with my White Trash Wednesday tradition, in spite of the newly created "No Her Wednesday" that didn't include me...because I was her.
- I rescued Fig from a bullshit DUI in Carrollton, made him buy me and Tesler food and shower...then we had a big time at the Farm Machinery Show!
- I discovered Swamp People! Choot 'em! He keeps rollin'! Tell him to stop!
- I rocked two job interviews...and then didn't get the job.
- Favorite Quote: "Talking two random guys in a Dodge into a burnout outside of Broadbent arena was priceless. Getting hit in the face by gravel while standing behind the truck throwing up the metal horns was a little unsettling." - Me
- I decided to blame it all on Waylon, no matter what.
- I learned that if there is a song playing that me and Jdale don't like, singing "Pumped Up Kicks" to ourselves would keep us dancing right along.
- "Bob Chinigans." Enough Said.
- I passed the Mini Bus training - did not slam into anything! I then decided that I was ready for a truck.
- I learned that you can't trust anyone with Ice Blue eyes...it's on the poster in the doctor's office...one of those things I should have learned in Kindergarten.
- I learned that you can't go into the liquor store without shoes on...but you can sure go through the drive thru without them.
- I almost lost my baby sister in a head on collision. I stood on scene while she was cut out of her car, cut out of her clothes and flown away in a helicopter...and I was completely traumatized.
- I realized that if a best friend doesn't have time to call and check on your baby sister after she almost dies in a head on collision, she isn't a friend worth having.
- I started working first shift again! I gave up my weekends for evenings and actually began to live like a human being instead of a vampire!
- Guess what? Duran is pregnant!
- I saw a monkey barf at the Louisville Zoo, and then eat it! Fantastic!
- I learned that even if you stumble, it's forward progress.
- I learned to adapt & overcome.
- Favorite Quote: "well hello there, April Fool's day....I guess the joke's on me this year?...ha! watch me wake up with a smile and a purpose. i'll straight take a shit in today's face and we'll see who has the laugh..." - Me
- I learned that no matter what, tomorrow starts free of mistakes.
- Diesel Ray celebrated his 10th year of being my best friend! The best thing decision I ever made was the day I decided to be him's person!
- I took a mini-vacation to Hell, Michigan with Mandango Chadwell! Got whiskey bent & hell bound, ate a Beef & Cheddar from the corner of Sharts & Central, realized that its hard to find hell - even for people like me and Casey. Drove back across Michigan to Lake Erie, and I swear I saw Canada.
- I became friends with Chris Suter on Facebook!
- I realized that the best way to watch a sun rise is thru high-definition aviators.
- I learned that face value has no worth. Just because they say it, don't make it true.
- I fell in love with Stinky Andy and bought him. Vehicular soul mate.
- I interviewed for another job at the Lodge...and snagged it!
- I went frog giggin' with Christopher. Had a big time...except for the slimy sack and the bigfoot scare.
- I decided for a brief moment that joining up with the Ren Faire and living free was my life's calling.
- I became half of a brush-hauling helluva-duo with Duran. Only lost the payload once!
- Christopher decided that he had sweet nothings that he needed to whisper in my ear, and wouldn't leave me alone about it.
- Favorite Quote: "She opens her heart to an old memory - she closes her eyes and she smiles." - Blackhawk
- They told us we couldn't go back there...but we did.
- Stay-Cation 2012 kicked off with a cooler completely loaded down with blue mountains. I'm talking double layered, plum full - and we drank them all at some truck races.
- I had every single one of my favorites together for the 4th. Every single last one of them. Between the barn doors. :)
- Taylorsville. Back this bitch out into the water, untie all the cable & rope.
- River Tuesdays come into our lives. We welcomed them with open arms, and open beers.
- I took my first trip up the mountain to the corn field, to see the stars.
- I took my first trip to the railroad tracks, too.
- I came home from work to find food, roses, a bubble bath, and Christopher semi-wrapped in tin foil. He asked me to be his Stuff again, and I said yes.
- Favorite Quote: "I'll be your one more time, if you'll be my last chance."
- I saved Duran & Company from what appeared to be a crazy rapist serial killer outside her bedroom window. False alarm.
- I attended the Froggy Field Party - discovered the awesomeness that is Dustin Lynch. Heard Cowboys & Angels from the front row.
- Warrior Football commenced! Wyatt Scott is a wild child!
- I decided that Stinky Andy was not my vehicular soul mate after all. This whole time, it was Stinky Charlie.
- I learned how to successfully funnel a beer...and puked in Charlie.
- I met Jdale with two cold coors lights, and made a toast to her coming home.
- We learned what caused that...longstrokin'. :)
- In honor of Pleasureville Day, we had an Jessicawhompus yard sale of epic proportions, down on main street.
- I decided that Pleasureville wasn't big enough for the three of us.
- WALKING! DRIVING! WINNING!
- I decided that I had other friendships that were not worth having. I made it known. I pissed the world off. I didn't care!
- I watched Wyatt sack a quarterback with the force of a mack truck. Loved watching him celebrate! "Now, THAT'S how you HIT a quarterback!"
- I decided that after months of playing Lion King with the stupid Android phone, it was time to return to the trusty crackberry, and I made it so. Going from the Android to the Blackberry was just like going from Andy back to Charlie...everything worked and it went fast!
- I got pulled over for speeding and took my seat belt off before the state boy made it to the car window. Nothing like charming a state boy with a stupid story and getting away with doing with 50 in a 25 mph zone!
- I learned that as a co-pilot, it's best to watch YOUR side of the truck. RIP Mighty Dodge!
- I decided that I was too pale and needed color. Dana made the hair Chocolate Brown.
- Favorite Quote: "Piss Jdale...did you see me accidentally lose control of that beer bottle just now?"
- I discovered sassy pants.
- I realized that if the farmer left the pumpkins in the patch, they were probably defective or looked like balls.
- I learned that Christopher is a professional photo-bomber.
- I finally defined "Mastermind" as Intuitive, Smart & Paranoid.
- I got to act like I was Luigi & Jdale acted like she was Mario while trick or treating at the zoo!
- Steelers beat the Bungals. :)
- Jdale got a new bracelet, it wasn't very pretty.
- Pumpkin Party 2012 went off with out a hitch! Good times as always!
- Christopher planned a huge surprise for our 3 month anniversary! Complete with dinner, a movie, a BBC variety pack, crazy daisies, brand new boots, a hotel room and a Jacuzzi. The best part was still him. <3
- I learned that if you swallow $30 bath oil, it'll make your poop slick.
- I spent Halloween in comfy pants, drinking potato water and eating rib-eyes with Jdale.
- Favorite Quote: "ma'am, I hope you don't mind, but I followed and watched you make that Lady's plate. I just want you to know that your service is beautiful. This world is blessed to have you in it. You're like a rainbow on a challenging day and I just had to meet you." - Woman In Golden Corral
- Duran's Baby Shower! We totally love Baby Sara!
- Upon the request of an old accomplice, I started this blog and have enjoyed writing again ever since!
- I totally helped put duct tape racing stripes on Fig's ranger. Go Dingo, go!
- For the first time in a decade, we decided to grace six mile jam-bo-ree with our awesome presence! Such good times in that shit hole! Even learned a couple dance moves. :)
- Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2. Enough said.
- I decided that I most certainly miss my blonde hair...the chocolate brown must go!
- I discovered that at 28 years old, I've suddenly got freckles.
- Friend Thanksgiving, although a tad late this year, went perfectly! Randaddy's turkey was fabulous!
- I went back to line-dancing class, only to grapevine into a Jdale fart.
- I spent two hours in a traffic line to see Lights Under Louisville with Jdale and 3 kiddos. Somehow, we didn't have to pay.
- I waited for hours in a waiting room until Baby Sara decided to make her grand entrance into the world on 12/19 at 11:11 pm. She was welcomed by a wonderful loving family. Weighing in at a whole 9 pounds & 19.5 inches long, she beautiful and perfect...and super tan.
- I survived the 21st of December, 2012. Ha!
- I spent the holidays with all of my favorite Christmas people, and it was such a big time. I even got to see Nestor again this year, and that's always an awesome event worth mentioning...because he's from the Bible!
...and I think that just about sums it all up!
I'm ready for 2013...who's coming with me?!
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